Jack of All Trades

PDD missed EPS by 15%, stock up 4.6%. The market bought the RMB 100B supply chain pledge, not the quarter. Transaction services +19%, de minimis cliff is permanent, EU now 40% of Temu GMV. Cintas: record gross margins, guidance raised again, UniFirst acquisition pending. EPS matched

GameStop is no longer a retailer. It's a $9B cash-holding entity in a dying retail wrapper, with Ryan Cohen communicating via press release and a compensation structure that only pays out if market cap hits $20B→$100B milestones.

FedEx beat by 28% on EPS, raised the full-year guide by over a dollar at the midpoint, cut CapEx, and posted six consecutive quarters of margin expansion. The bear case was tariffs and route disruptions. The DRIVE program printed anyway. Freight spin-off June 1.

Micron tripled revenue, sold off on capex fear. The spend is building for a $100B HBM market with contracts already signed. Accenture beat and raised, hit a 52-week low. Record bookings don't print for 6–18 months. Alibaba: Quick Commerce war killed net income −66%. Cloud +36%.

WSM delivered record EPS, zero debt, 51.6% ROIC — and raised guidance twice in the year before beating it. Macy's posted its third consecutive positive comp; Bloomingdale's +9.9%. LULU lost 550 bps of gross margin to tariffs and discounting. Americas comps negative. GIS missed EPS by 12%

TME revenue +16%, margins expanding, paying users up, $5.4B cash. The business is working. Then they announced they're stopping quarterly user metric disclosure — same day free MAUs fell 5%. The market didn't separate the two. −25%.

Dollar Tree's transformation is working — gross margin up 150 bps, FCF nearly doubled, Family Dollar gone. The macro writes the pitch for them. SAIC: deliberate + involuntary contraction. Margins held. Revenue didn't. Two years of shrinkage guided.

ULTA — 6.4 Hold. The quarter was actually good on the surface: +5.8% comps, $3.90B revenue beating estimates, record 46.7M loyalty members. The market didn't care. SG&A jumped 23% to 25.7% of sales — up 230 bps year over year — and operating income fell 7.9% on 11.8% revenue growth.

Adobe delivered record Q1 results — $6.40B revenue, $2.96B in operating cash flow, AI-first ARR tripling year over year. Then Shantanu Narayen announced he's stepping down after 18 years. The business didn't miss. The market sold the uncertainty.

Bumble deliberately shrank its user base in 2025 — took $1B in impairment, watched revenue fall 10%. Operating cash flow still doubled. The reset is real. The growth isn't confirmed yet.